Holiday Classics Rewritten
by Princess-of-Your-Doom95
Summary: I was bored so I gave some people from Ooo the job of rewriting classic holiday songs. Rated T for Holiday Mathmatical-ness
1. Marceline

**I was feeling...bored, oh so bored. So I decided to tamper with some favorite songs of the holidays. This one is by Marceline the Vampire Queen.**

**DISCLAIMER- I do NOT own Adventure Time, nor do I own this holiday carol.**

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><p>The Twelve Days of Christmas by Marceline the Vampire Queen<p>

On the first day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>A Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the second day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p>

On the third day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>3 Party Bears  
>2 Awesome Heroes<br>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the fourth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>4 Fuzzy Friends  
>3 Party Bears<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p>

On the fifth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>5 Power Rings  
>4 Fuzzy Friends<br>3 Party Bears  
>2 Awesome Heroes<br>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the sixth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>6 Baby Pigs  
>5 Power Rings<br>4 Fuzzy Friends  
>3 Party Bears<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p>

On the seventh day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>7 Old Swans a Kissing  
>6 Baby Pigs<br>5 Power Rings  
>4 Fuzzy Friends<br>3 Party Bears  
>2 Awesome Heroes<br>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the eighth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>8 Super Freak Parts  
>7 Old Swans a Kissing<br>6 Baby Pigs  
>5 Power Rings<br>4 Fuzzy Friends  
>3 Party Bears<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p>

On the ninth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>9 Battle Cubes a Battling  
>8 Super Freak Parts<br>7 Old Swans a Kissing  
>6 Baby Pigs<br>5 Power Rings  
>4 Fuzzy Friends<br>3 Party Bears  
>2 Awesome Heroes<br>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the tenth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>10 Bucket Knights  
>9 Battle Cubes a Battling<br>8 Super Freak Parts  
>7 Old Swans a Kissing<br>6 Baby Pigs  
>5 Power Rings<br>4 Fuzzy Friends  
>3 Party Bears<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p>

On the eleventh day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>11 Princess Kisses  
>10 Bucket Knights<br>9 Battle Cubes a Battling  
>8 Super Freak Parts<br>7 Old Swans a Kissing  
>6 Baby Pigs<br>5 Power Rings  
>4 Fuzzy Friends<br>3 Party Bears  
>2 Awesome Heroes<br>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree

On the twelfth day of Christmas  
>my true love sent to me:<br>12 Vampire Servants  
>11 Princess Kisses<br>10 Bucket Knights  
>9 Battle Cubes a Battling<br>8 Super Freak Parts  
>7 Old Swans a Kissing<br>6 Baby Pigs  
>5 Power Rings<br>4 Fuzzy Friends  
>3 Party Bears<br>2 Awesome Heroes  
>and a Snow Golem in a Pear Tree<p> 


	2. Ice King

**To ****Christmas (who wrote - Dude, I'm not kidding, SEND THIS TO AT! IT COULD BE A PROMO!)****Well thanks, if I knew how I totally would. Thanks for the review :D**

**Next on the list is Ice King. He will be singing Santa Baby**.  
><em>Acutally it's 'Santa<em> Buddy' now.  
><strong>Whatever, Ice King. It's your song.<strong>

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><p>Santa Buddy by Ice King<p>

Santa buddy, slip Bubblegum under the tree, for me  
>I've been an awful good guy<br>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa buddy, a lumpy-space convertible too, light blue  
>I'll wait up for you dude<br>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Think of all the fun I've missed  
>Think of all the darlings that I haven't kissed<br>Next year I could be oh so good  
>If you'd check off my Christmas list<br>Boo doo bee doo

Santa homie, I wanna Princess and really that's  
>Not a lot<br>I've been an awesome guy all year  
>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight<p>

Santa buddy, there's one thing I really do need, the deed  
>To a marriage of mine<br>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Santa buddy, I'm filling my stocking with a drum set, and penguins  
>I'm sure we'll have a good time<br>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Come and trim my Christmas tree  
>With some decorations bought at Choose Goose's<br>I really do believe in you  
>Let's see if you believe in me<br>Boo doo bee doo

Santa buddy, forgot to mention one little thing, a ring  
>I don't mean a phone<br>Santa buddy, so hurry down the chimney tonight

Hurry down the chimney tonight  
>Hurry down the chimney tonight<p> 


	3. Jake the Dog

**Hey hey! Another edition of our remakes is here! This time we have Deck The Halls by Jake the Dog.**

**DISCLAIMER - I do NOT own Adventure Time or this holiday carol**

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><p>Deck The Halls by Jake the Dog<p>

Deck the halls with tons of pudding,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>Tis the season to go mudding,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p>

Don you now your hero apparel,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>Trolls ate the Princess Carol,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p>

See the blazing villages before us,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>Strike the harpies and join the chorus.  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p>

Follow rulers in merry measure,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>While I tell of pirate treasure,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p>

Slow away, this old year passes,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>Hail the Pumpkin King, ye lads and lasses,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p>

Sing the sharpies joyous, all together,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<br>Heedless of the eggnog weather,  
>Fa la la la la, la la la la.<p> 


	4. MeMow

**Ok, next up is...Me-Mow? I don't remember assigning her a** **song!**  
><em>Do you have a problem with me doing a song?<br>_**Considering you are threatening me with a syringe of poison..no, I don't have a problem** ***gulps***  
><em>That's what I thought.<em>

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><p>Me-Mow, the Tiny White Assassin Cat by Me-Mow<p>

Me-Mow, the tiny white assassin cat  
>had failed a very important test..<br>And if you ever saw her,  
>you would see her very angry.<p>

All of the other assassins  
>laugh and call her names.<br>They never let poor Me-Mow  
>join in the Guild of Assassins.<p>

Then one foggy Christmas Eve  
>Santa came to say:<br>"Me-Mow, with your heart of stone,  
>won't you join my army of assassins tonight?"<p>

Then all the assassins loved her  
>As they shouted out with glee,<br>Me-Mow, the tiny white assassin cat,  
>You'll go down in history!<p> 


	5. Fionna and Cake

**Readers! I came back with another song for you! This time by Fionna and Cake. But first, I must address a few things.**

**Ryan - I am definitely going to do Finn and Bubblegum, I just can't find songs to use. I'm looking really hard for songs that can be twisted into Adventure Time songs...it's hard. but I'll find them something. My sister suggested they sing a duet, so I'm looking into that :)**

**Christmas - I sent a link to someone who works for Adventure Time on tumblr like you said. Whether they use it or not is up to them, but I would be very proud if they read it. Thank you for telling me how to send it :D**

**Disclaimer - I do NOT own Adventure Time or this holiday classic. **

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><p>You're A Mean One, Mr. Grinch by Fionna and Cake<p>

You're a mean one, Ice Queen  
>You really are a heel.<br>You're as cuddly as a Fire Newt,  
>And as charming as an eel,<br>Ice Queen!

You're a bad desperate woman,  
><strong>(Cake - Fionna, don't say that!)<br>**And apparently romance deprived! **  
><strong>You're a monster, Ice Queen!  
>Your heart's an empty hole.<br>Your brain is full of icicles.  
>You've got ice in your soul,<br>Ice Queen!

I wouldn't touch you  
>With a thirty-nine-and-a-half foot crystal sword!<br>You're a vile one, Ice Queen!  
><strong>(Cake - Fionna! Stop being rude!)<br>Y**ou have coldness in your bones.  
>You have all the tender sweetness<br>Of a seasick crocodile,  
>Ice Queen!<p>

Given the choice between the two of you,  
>I'd take the seasick crocodile!<br>**(Fionna - Oh, now who's being rude?)**  
><strong>(Cake - I know, but you started it)<strong>  
><strong>(Fionna - Just trying to be honest)<br>**You're a foul one, Ice Queen!  
>You're a nasty, wasty skunk!<br>Your heart is full of unwashed socks.  
>Your soul is full of gunk,<br>**(Fionna - That's really gross)**  
>Ice Queen!<p>

The three words that best describe you  
>Are as follows, and I quote,<br>"Mean, Ice, Queen!"  
>You're a rotter, Ice Queen!<br>You're the Queen of sinful sots!  
>Your heart's a dead tomato,<br>Splotched with moldy, purple spots,  
>Ice Queen!<br>**(Fionna - Nasty)**  
><strong>(Cake - Agreed)<strong>

Your soul is an appalling dump-heap,  
>Overflowing with the most disgraceful<br>assortment of deplorable rubbish imaginable,  
>Mangled-up in tangled-up knots!<br>You nauseate me, Ice Queen!  
><strong>(Fionna - Ok, that one was really mean.)<strong>  
><strong>(Cake - I must agree)<strong>  
>With a nauseous super naus!<br>You're a crooked jerky jockey,  
>And you drive a crooked hoss,<br>Ice Queen!

You're a three-decker everything burrito  
>and toadstool sandwich,<br>With evil sauce!


	6. Ice Queen

**Hey readers of mine! Up next is...who the heck are you?  
><strong>_I am the Ice_ Queen!  
><em><strong>Ok...how did you get in here? I didn't assign you a<strong> _**song!**  
><em>*charges an ice attack* Is there a problem with me singing a<em> song?  
><strong>Considering I keep geting threatened by people...no, not really. Go ahead and sing, just don't hurt<strong> **me.**  
><em>This song goes out to my dear Prince Bubblegum.<em>

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><p>Merry Christmas Baby by Ice Queen<p>

Merry Christmas baby, I wish you'd treat me nice  
>Merry Christmas baby, I wish you'd treat me nice<br>And give me a diamond ring for Christmas  
>Then I'd live in paradise<p>

Well I'm feeling' mighty fine, got good music on my radio  
>Well I'm feeling' mighty fine, got good music on my radio<br>And I wanna kiss you baby,  
>While you're standing underneath the mistletoe, if only Fionna wasn't in the way<p>

Well I guess Santa came down the chimney  
>About half past three<br>And left all these pretty presents  
>That I see before me<br>But you weren't in my stocking, really is a shame  
>Merry Christmas my Bubblegum Prince, I'd be just perfect to thee<p> 


	7. Marceline's Dad

_Hello pitiful mortals. I have currently...distracted the author so that I may get a song in here. So here we go..._

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><p>Please Come Home For Christmas by Marceline's Father, Lord of Evil<p>

Bells will be probably ringing this sad and lonely New Years  
>Oh what a Christmas to have the blues<br>My baby girl's gone with her friends  
>Not wanting to wish me greetings ever again<p>

Cries will be surely singing Silent Night  
>And Christmas carols by candle light<br>Marceline, please come home for Christmas  
>Oh, please come home for Christmas<br>So I can spend the holidays with my baby girl tonight

Friends and relations send their salutations  
>Wanting to visit you in the world above<br>And this is Christmas, yes, Christmas my dear  
>The time of year to be with the ones you love<p>

So don't you tell me you'll never more roam  
>Because I hope Christmas and new Years will find you home<br>There'll be no more sorrow no grief and pain  
>And I won't devour any souls, if it would make you happy once again<p>

Oh there'll be no more sorrow, no grief and pain  
>And I'll be happy at Christmas time once again<p> 


	8. Peppermint Butler

_Good day, Miss Author. I was wondering if I could join in on your song_ story.  
><strong>Sure, Peppermint Butler. At least you asked. :)<strong>

**DISCLIAMER - I do NOT own Adventure Time or this holiday song.**

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><p>The Christmas Song by Peppermint Butler<p>

Smores roasting on an open fire,  
>Ice King sending ice beams at your nose,<br>Everyone sing carols as if they're in a choir,  
>And folks dressed up in sweaters.<p>

Everybody knows the holiday turkey and hides some mistletoe,  
>Help to make the season bright.<br>Tiny gumdrops with their eyes all-aglow,  
>Will find it hard to sleep tonight.<p>

They know that Santa's on his way;  
>He's loaded lots of toys and goodies on his sleigh.<br>And every mother's child is going to spy,  
>To see if reindeer really know how to fly.<p>

And so I'm offering this simple phrase,  
>To kids from one to ninety-two,<br>Although its been said many times, many ways,  
>A very Merry Christmas to you!<p> 


	9. Princess Bubblegum

**Hello my loyal subjects, it's Princess Bubblegum here. The author is being froced to clean her house for her mother, so I am going to introduce the next couple of chapters. I hope you are enjoying reading this story, we have all worked very hard on theses songs.**

**DISCLAIMER - The author does NOT own me, Adventure Time, or these holiday songs.**

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><p>Let It Snow by Princess Bubblegum<p>

Oh, the weather outside is frightful, thanks Ice King  
>But the fire is so delightful<br>And since I've no other place to go  
>Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow<p>

Ice King doesn't show signs of stopping  
>And I brought some spaghetti for eating<br>The sound on Beemo turned way down low  
>Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow<p>

When we finally hug good-night  
>How I'll hate going out in the storm<br>But if you protect me from Ice King tonight  
>I'll be at home safe and warm<p>

The fire is slowly dying  
>And, my hero, we're still good-bye-ing<br>But as long as you secretly love me so  
>Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow<p>

When we finally hug good-night  
>How I'll hate going out in the storm<br>But if you protect me from Ice King tonight  
>I'll be at home safe and warm<p>

The fire is slowly dying  
>And, my hero, we're still good-bye-ing<br>But as long as you secretly love me so  
>Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow<p> 


	10. Finn the Human

**Hello there. Nice to see you again. Up next is Finn the Human's** **song.**  
><em>Uh...Princess?<em>  
><strong>Yes,<strong> **Finn?**  
><em>Can you not be here when I sing<em> this?  
><strong>But why?<br>**_*blushes* Just...please?_  
><strong>Oh, alright. Enjoy Finn's song *leaves area*<br>**_Uh, ok...so let's do this._

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><p>What Christmas Means To Me by Finn the Human<p>

Flambo is burning low  
>To avoid setting fire to the mistletoe<br>There's lots of snow and ice  
>Everywhere we go<br>Cuties are singing carols  
>Right outside the tree house door<p>

All these things and more  
>(All these things and more, baby)<br>That's what Christmas means to me, my friends  
>(That's what Christmas means to me, my friends)<p>

And ya know what I mean  
>I see your smiling face<br>Like I never seen before  
>Even though I love ya madly<br>It seems I love you more  
>And homemade sweater that you give me<br>Will always touch my heart for sure

All these things and more, darling  
>(All these things and more, darling)<br>That's what Christmas means to me, my Princess  
>(That's what Christmas means to me, my Princess)<p>

I feel like running wild  
>As Guardian Angels and a little thief child<br>Kidnap you from underneath the mistletoe  
>So the Ice King can kiss you once and then some more<br>Won't happen on my watch, dear Princess  
>This I can promise<p>

And I wish you a Merry Christmas, baby  
>(Wish you a Merry Christmas, baby)<br>And such happiness in the coming year  
>(Happiness in the coming year)<br>Hopefully Ice King will stay away from here

Let's deck the halls with holly  
>Sing sweet Silent Night<br>Fill a sheet with Bubblegum's hair  
>And pretty, pretty lights<br>Go to sleep and wake up  
>Just before daylight<p>

And all these things and more, baby  
>(All these things and more, baby)<br>That's what Christmas means to me, my friends  
>(That's what Christmas means to me, my friends)<p>

Flambo is burning low  
>To avoid setting fire to the mistletoe<br>There's lots of snow and ice  
>Everywhere we go<br>Cuties are singing carols  
>Right outside the tree house door<p>

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><p><strong>Awww! Finn that was so<strong> **sweet!**  
><em>Princess! When did you get here?<br>_**I never left. You are just the sweetest friend** **ever!**  
><em>*blushes* Oh, geez...<em>


	11. Finn the Human and Luna the Ice Princess

**Ok, so this is my final song. This is a duet between Finn and my OC, Luna the Ice Princess. The song will go as the following; **_Italics = Both Finn and Luna, _**Bold = Finn, and **Normal = Luna.

**I hope you all have a very merry Christmas, a super Happy New Year, and an epic time with your families.**

**DISCLAIMER - I do NOT own Finn, Adventure Time, or this holiday song. I DO own Luna though.**

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><p>Extraordinary Christmas by Finn the Human and Luna the Ice Princess<p>

_It came into my dreams last night  
><em>_A great, big man in blue and white._

**He told me that it's gonna be  
><strong>**A special year for you and me.**

Underneath the mistletoe  
>Hold me tight and kiss me slow<p>

**The snow is high so come inside  
><strong>**I wanna hear you say to me!**

_It's a very, very, merry, merry Christmas  
><em>_Gonna party on 'til Santa grants my wishes._

Got my tiara on, and I know what I want  
>It's who I'm with.<p>

_It's an extraordinary merry Christmas.  
><em>_It doesn't come as a surprise_

**Who's been naughty, who's been nice  
><strong>**There's someone here for everyone**

Another year has just begun.  
>Silent night, not inside<p>

**Sleigh bells ring until the light  
><strong>**Hearts explode, here we go  
><strong>**It's all like they're inside your eyes!**

_It's a very, very, merry, merry Christmas.  
><em>_Gonna party on 'til Santa grants my wishes_.

Got my tiara on, and I know what I want  
>It's who I'm with.<p>

**It's an extraordinary merry Christmas!  
><strong>**Won't you meet me by the tree?**

To slip away so secretly?  
>Can't you see that this could be?<br>The greatest gift of all!

_It's a very, very, merry, merry Christmas.  
><em>_Gonna party on 'til Santa grants my wishes_.

Got my tiara on, and I know what I want  
>It's who I'm with.<p>

**It's an extraordinary merry…  
>It's a very, very, merry, merry Christmas.<strong>  
><strong>Gonna party on 'til Santa grants my wishes.<strong>

Got my tiara on, and I know what I want  
>It's who I'm with.<p>

**It's an extraordinary merry Christmas!  
><strong>It's a very, very, merry, merry Christmas.  
><em>It's an extraordinary merry Christmas!<em>


End file.
